I decided to do something a little different for this post. I know I don’t normally write this type of stuff here but poetry has really helped me a lot and I decided to share some of it because why not? Lately I’ve been feeling shitty, as always. It was a different kind of shitty though. I know where some of it stemmed from, sort of, but at the same time, it’s also a huge blur, if that makes sense. It’s just this weird feeling and I don’t know how to describe it. Anyway, because of that, I almost did something really stupid and impulsive which probably would’ve turned out really messy because whenever I do pretty much anything, that’s what happens. However, that same feeling caused me to not do that. It’s hard to explain and I don’t quite understand it myself but that’s just what happened. Instead, I decided to write poetry out of that same impulsivity and post it here where I’ll probably be judged really harshly but who cares about anything anymore? That being said, here, a not so profound poem written by none other than me, an emotionally unstable teenage girl who just wants to go to sleep and forget that any of her problems even exist.
I am content
but I’m not happy
When I decided to give you my heart,
I decided to give you everything
I decided to let go of me
and to hold onto you
Little did I know that in doing so,
I’d be hurting
not only me, but you:
Little did I know
that within a matter of time,
I would lose everything
I am content
but I am not happy
You’re still here
You’re still just a moment away
You’re still a part of my world
Or at least I like to think of it like that
Sometimes I wonder
How much do I cross your mind?
In what way am I still there?
Am I even still there like you are?
Or do I simply not exist?
Like everyone else,
was I just swept under the rug?
It seems that in some aspects
I am there
At least when I have to be,
I am there
But I will never truly know
Though sometimes ignorance is bliss
and sometimes, people need to let go
and finally, for once
Okay, now that that’s done, I would genuinely enjoy some feedback because I could really use some validation right now. Although, just a side note, you can interpret this in any way you want. There’s no single meaning to this even though it may seem blatantly obvious. I wrote this with a handful of things on my mind and while one of those thoughts was a main factor and is definitely a huge part of this, there’s more which leaves the meaning of this poem, or at least certain aspects of it, up to you. Just keep that in mind. With that, goodbye for now my dear readers. I’m sorry this post was shorter than normal. It’s just something I needed to get off my chest. I’ll be back with less artistic crap some other time.